Sunday, September 21, 2008

JOHN - September 21, 2008, Guanajuato

Last night we had our first real dinner party at our house with three other couples and their kids. One couple is from Japan and run a great sushi restaurant in the Plaza de San Fernando in town, another is from Mexico expecting their first baby in the next few weeks, and the third couple is a man from Guatamala and a woman from Chile. Two of the couples send their kids to the school Noelle and Aydan go to, and another lives on our street. It was a fun night and felt like we are making some good friends.

This past week, the girls had Monday and Tuesday off to celebrate Independence Day here in Mexico. Guananajuato and Hidalgo are the two key historical cities where the war for independence began in 1810. In that year, a priest named Miguel Hidalgo

Sunday, August 24, 2008

JOHN - August 19, 2008, Guanajuato

School Starts
Beep. Beep. Beep. The alarm went off reading 7am. But it was so dark. We all awoke just in case, then realized it was 7am Boston time, 6am here. School started at 8:00 and they asked us to arrive at 7:45 to get settled.

We arrived late at 8:00 even though we are a 1 minute walk past 2 homes. Mexican time meets McGah time!

JOHN - August 18, 2008, Guanajuato

Leaving Wayland

The alarm goes off at 4:00 am but Aydan and I were already awake in our different rooms. Ashley was up packing – not sure she ever really went to sleep. Today is D-day, the day we fly from Boston to Houston to Mexico to live for 1 year. It is a major operation worthy of the best military options (I think my wife was in special ops before I met her.) Yesterday was the final packing, arranging, storing, cleaning, goodbyes but the process for all of the above has been going on for months.

At 23:00 hours last night, Ashley and I went to bed. We had packed our neighbors'/friends', the O’Shaughnessey’s, large SUV with 6 very large suitcases all identifiable because of their colors (pink, light blue, grey) and large, bright polka dots. I was picturing touching down in the land of machismo among dungarees and cowboy hats and being the lone gringo male making way to reach for his fluorescent, pink polka dotted—unmistakable—suitcase. Why not enter with a splash?

The day before we packed cleaned out the garage, fixed our humidifier in the basement, left final instructions for our renter Kay. No emotional preparation at all other that a moment with each goodbye to a friend or family member when the emotion of saying goodbye overtook the logistics mindset momentarily and the weight of the change hit home briefly. Amidst the work we had visits from Demetra, Mark and Kim O’Shaughnessey and their daughters Abby and Emily, Jackson Madnick, my parents, John and Helen, my sister Kathleen from Cambridge who just got home from a tiring long wedding and with an infant at home, and at the very end of the night Sean Sweeney, followed by Tom, Beth, Clara and Chris Hurney our friends across the street. Each dropped by and ended up doing something useful that without I’m not sure we would have made it out on time in such good shape.

In fact, one of the greatest gifts of this entire process was the reminder that we are part of a fantastic community in Wayland, our home for the past 5 years, and our friends, including colleagues, and family scattered all around. The encouragement, heartfelt goodbyes, and help brought all that home. We are leaving the country to have a bonding experience as a family and exploring a slower pace of life. But it is very gratifying to know that even in our fast paced, often stressful life of the United States we are part of a real, nurturing, full community.

Scheduled to leave at 0430 hours, we left about 5 minutes after. Not bad. We backed out the massive O’Shaughnessey rig, packed to the hilt, with absolutely no rear vision in the cool black of early morning. I think I crushed some flowers at the end of the driveway, but what they hell, it was Kay’s problem now! (Just kidding Kay).

We met my parents at the airport—they were there at 4:30am even through we were meeting at 5am. Luckily they did because they figured out there was no flight at International, we had to be at domestic since we had a layover in Houston.

Kim dropped us off. At curbside we met a flight crew that had just brought the Patriots back from Tampa. One was genuinely intrigued by the amount of stuff we had – including two vocal cats—and proceeded to tell her colleagues all about our adventure. She also took a group photo for us.

We got in line looking like we were heading on a royal safari and proceeded to check in 11 luggage items with an additional 8 carry on items. Our stuff included (sung to the tune of "A Partidge in a Pear ट्री") 6 polka dotted suitcases, 4 mid size luggage, 3 heavy laptops, 2 wailing cats, 1 bulky guitar, and Noelle’s own violin case.

At check in we met an angel and it’s a good thing. Our baggage in total was well over the allowed number and most were over the allowed weight, and apparently Continental had an embargo on their usual number of allowed items. We got wind of this the day before but every call we made to the airline gave a us a different answer which was extremely frustrating, along with the fact that website was unclear and did not coincide with the phone support. We felt we had to go for it thinking the confusion at their end might work to our advantage.

We got lucky in that an angel of a woman checked us in. She was genuinely excited about our trip. Bag after bag was overweight but she patiently checked us in and charged us only $100 for the collective excess weight. It could have been hundreds more, or worse, disallowed. Then our Angel, a former 5th grade substitute teacher from Revere, said, “grab a coffee, say goodbye to your family, and then I’ll escort you to the front of the security line, you’ll be fine.”

Then our last goodbye to Grandma and Papa. This was it. No more, “oh, we’ll see Sunday one more time,” etc. The last goodbye. I expected it to be tough for my Mom. I think she is hardest hit by our leaving for a whole year, and taking her grandchildren with us. She was tearful and gave an especially firm hug, as did I. “I’m OK.” She said. “Seeing you in October helps.” They filmed the whole goodbye following us to the security line then walked off into the Boston morning.

They were off to a life of speaking English, renting movies “on demand,” chicken sandwiches made to order, all the Red Sox coverage a guy could want, their friends, their climate, security, comfort of knowing what the day has in store for the most part. I started to sweat in line. At the front of security, carrying two very nervous cats, I asked if it was OK to let them out to stretch their legs. They chuckled and told me that passengers had to carry their cat through the metal detector and place the bags on the belt. “We’ve had cats more than once break free,” one woman laughed. “It got pretty crazy.” Talk about letting the cat out of the bag!

As my parents walked off, with my culture with them, and as I stood in the slowest line known to man with two whining cats, excited children, and a wife who was in def con 3 mode hell bent to get on that plane, I started to sweat.

Another look back to my parents—to mommy and daddy. They were moving in slow motion through the automatic doors, their backs fading in the distance. I pictured cats running through a crowded airport as our plane was taking off. People screaming at me…chaos.

Wait!! Take me with you. This has all been a terrible mistake!! What the *&$@Q!! is going on here!?!? I know shit for Spanish. I’m a Red Sox fan not a soccer fan!! What they hell is a ____________ anyway? And though, yes, I enjoy the occasional enchilada and a cervesa or two, I need my grilled chicken sandwiches made to order—the way I like them. Where will I get take out Italian or sushi in a bind?!?!?! What about all my Beatles and Springsteen CDs I was supposed to download to our iPod and never got to? Someone get me off this f----d up train that my wife put me on…!!!! Aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…….

“Make sure all liquids are in a separate container, and that bags fit in the allotted size to be allowed on the plane.” Said a very stern machismo American man. “Laptops must be taken out of their case and placed in a separate gray container.” The man, dressed in white short sleeve security uniform, walked over to a passenger dressed in military camouflage uniform, told him something about his boots needing to come off, then very sternly shook his hand and said with intensity, “Thank you for your service.” He walked away, looking mad.

Through the line, cats out of the bag, then back in. Shoes off, then on, collecting children and laptops and a dripping plastic bag with fruit and drinks for the plane ride, we made it on. We got settled. Was told someone had moved our seat so a woman with two kids could sit together. “I am in the same boat as you.” She said to Ash. Yeah but that’s our seat! OK. No problem, I’ll sit in the inside seat next two big guys.

The plane ride was fine, save for constant but not too obnoxious meowing.

We were off. I looked at the row in front of me. Ashley, Noelle, and Aydan. Each was so excited…to be on this adventure and to be together. Last night as the girls went to bed I asked them to huddle up. “This is our last night in our house for a whole year,” I said as we 4 sat on the bed. “I just want you to know I could go anywhere in the world for any amount of time as long as I was together with each of you.” Es la vida.

We put our hands together in the middle. “On the count of three what shall we say?” “Guanajuato.” Ashley said. “one, two, three…” we raise our hands in unison and shouted, “Guanajuato!”



Arriving in Guanajuato

After a 2 hour layover in Houston, where we let the cats eat and walk around in a gross handicapped bathroom room, we boarded a much smaller plane bound for Leon and touched down about 1:30pm local time. Customs and baggage claim was easy, even with two cats. Celia Martinez, our landlord and her friend, a man from France named Daniel, picked us up in a huge rental van and drove us to Guanajuato 30 minutes away. That ride is not spectacular, but as we approached Guanajuato we started to see the historic architecture, the vibrant colors of the buildings, none over 2 stories except the Universidad de Guanajuato, or spectacular church, or public theater (more on those later). We stopped at a super market, got some things to get us through day 1, and went to our new home.

Valenciana, Guanajuato is on the outer edge of the city of Guanajuato. Our house is two doors down from a private Mexican school the girls are attending. We booked our flight because school started August 20, but we learned they had changed the day and school actually started Monday. So our first night was a school night.

Our house is large and great. Three bedrooms each with a bathroom, a large studio loft on the 4th floor, 2 large open balconies (one with a hot tub and built in grill), a dining room, big kitchen, an extra bathroom, living room, a couple of fire places and a study. It’s gated in unnecessarily which feels weird.

Perfect? No. Toilet pressure is weak so the landlord asked us on day one to please not throw any toilet paper in the toilet, rather in the trash. Hmm. Ok. One toilet would not flush on first try and kept running. The doors do not open from the inside without a key which we only have one of. No heat. They’ve gotten more rain here than they have in 12 years so it is cool now at night and during the day, but with a blanket in bed it is fine. We read that the temperature is typically 70º-90ºF in daytime throughout the year.

The best part about the house though is the view. Spectacular. We sit above a small valley of green trees (probably more brown when rainy season stops) then down further is he city of Guanajauto. It is beautiful in the morning and beautiful at night when lit up. The house has large glass window/walls on two sides on three floors, so you are never far from the view. That is my favorite part of the house.

Our first night we got rooms somewhat set, put some luggage away, and decided to walk into Valenciana and find a restaurant. We were starving. We walked, and walked up the hill near the _________ cathedral considered the most beautiful in the City. Everything was closed. We asked a police officer, a scary young woman who trying to get us to take a tour of the old silver mines, each had ideas but nothing was open.

Hungry and tired, we gave up and headed back home. OK. We’ll make a nice pasta dinner from the things we bought at the super market. Ashn made a sauce, I made a Noelle a peanut butter and Jelly. Then we realized we lost the pasta that we all swore we had seen in the kitchen. No we were really about to lose Aydan. Another PB&J, a grilled cheese, some eggs and cheese for Mommy and Daddy, and our first Mexican feast was in the record books. Ah, this was living!

We decided to pull the girls’ mattresses into our room for the first few nights. After brushing and pajamas, we all laid on our king bed, even the two cats who were settling in, and read a story, Rose Meets Mr. Wintergarten. There are some goals of this trip (learning Spanish, slowing down, absorbing another culture) that will take time. But I could already see the main goal of the trip being realized: bonding as a family. We were out of our comfort zone—a disorienting dilemma as we’d say on the AE project—but I could see the girls were comforted by being together, and Ashley and I are too. We are in it together.

We fell asleep at 10:30pm Boston time. Tomorrow was the first day of school, the first full day of life in Mexico.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

JOHN - April 20, 2008, Buenos Aires


Good Air

As flight AA961 began its descent into Buenos Aires, the captain spoke to his tired passengers the words we had been hungry to hear, ¨We´ll be landing in approximately 18 minutes in Buenos Aires.¨ Then he added, ¨Where the current temperature is about 70º and the weather is...well, smokey.¨ Smokey? We asked ourselves. He must mean polution, smog like Los Angeles, the haze produced by the traffic of any big city. Looking out over the city it was clearly think gray the color of the sky when it is about to pour rain. But these were not rainclouds, this was a thick, massive smoke that engulfed Buenos Aires, which translated literally means ¨good air¨in English.

We landed. Stepping off the plane onto the tunnel to the gate I immediately oticed the heat and could feel the smoke in the air. Thick and warm, it reminded me of traveling in Nepal and India. Then we waited in the long slow line for non Argentine citizens, showed our passports, scribbled out names, addresses, reasons for travel, make and model of our cell phones, and declared any goods over $300 (in our case nothing). Outside of customs we met our contact from the 5 Cool Rooms Hotel, a pretty, big boned, friendly woman, with big cleavage and a confidence that showed she was in charge and was there to take care of you. It was comforting in this big unfamilar airport to meet her next to a sign on a tall pole that said ¨Ashley Welch.¨ I went back and forth to the bank teller and another window exchange window and finally figured out the exchange rate (1 dollar equals 2.76 pesos) and then to the ATM to get 200 pesos for our one night stay.

Our driver was a man in his late 60s in a gray suit. Well dressed and friendly like a working class grandfather. Much like my grandfather actually who was a Cambridge bus driver. ¨Blah blah blah fumar blah bñah,¨ said Ashley to the driver, which apparently meant, ¨Where does all the smoke come from?¨ ¨Blah blah blah campos blah,¨ replied our grandfather driver. And then he added the insightful, ¨blah blah blah blah.¨ If there was any doubt before it was now painstakingly clear that my wife is much smarter than me. Somehow she figured out that famers outside of the city were burning the fields where they grew corn. But why?

We drove on from the airport. Big tall buildings to our left that looked like high rise projects, but quite shabby. They looked like slums you might see in Chicago or Nuevo York. Dirty, clothers hanging out of windows, not the romantic image of Argentina I held in my mind, but of course poverty is everywhere. I mentioned to Ashley that it would be interesting to spend some time in each country we visted to meet with people addressing homelessness. I had studied homelessness extensively in Hungary, the Netherlands, and Belgium in 2002 as part of an Eisenhower Fellowship I had received. It was a great learning experience for me to see what about homelessness was common to the western (and central Europe) world and what was uniquly American. I noticed what influence the United States had in those countries some of concerning and some worth celebrating. On one hand, there was evidence of American culture: MTV in Hungary for example. Music and blue jeans and an appreciation of the dream of freedom and openness in the U.S. On the I saw influence of a market economy in Hungary, who was going through political change after economic change for a people who were hungry fro stability. The inluence of the America economy was evident, as it also was at the European Union where I met with members of parliament and some EU mid level administrators. Promte private business, help Europe compete globally, less public assistance <>. When the ¨political change¨came to Hungary, that is after the fall of the Soviet Union and the resultant change in government in 1989 in Hungary to a market economy and democratically elected government, change came fast. Housing owned by the government was bought for a song by the communist local government leaders, and rented at market rates which were quite expensive. Government factories often had worker housing, both of which were closed down the result being a lack of low skilled labor and housing. Housing prices--for sale and for rent--was at a premium. Combine this with no history of homeless services (homelessness was illegal in communist Hungary so there was not tradition of non government associations )NGOs) or a civil sector. That has changed ince 1989 but there was a lot of catch up and homelessness exploded in Budapest. Yet despite the explosion and remarkable conditions that contributed to such homelessness, the rates of homelessness (the percentage of homeless people inthe general population) were alost identical to that of my home city, Boston. Boston is one of the cities historically ¨better¨at dealing with homelessness. And yet the same rates of homelessness as Budapest with all of its change. Budapest had no homeless veterans. In the U.S., 1 in 4 American homeless men are homeless-- a sober reminder in present wartime America as more and more Iraqi War veterans come home with post traumatic stres disorder (PTSD), which can lead to isloation, detachment, depression, ubstance abuse, and homelessmess. The U.S. military is much better at identifying PTSD than during the Vietnam War, yet still war permenantly marks soldiers and their families and the results can include homelessness.

We checked into our boutique hotel in Buenos Aires, ¨5 Cool Rooms.¨ (We like ¨boutique¨ anything. Interaction Associates where Ashley works is described as a boutique training and consulting firm. Its supposed to imply really high end but not so tacky as a huge soul-less corporate culture firm, or a huge hotel. No. Clearly we are more sophisticated than other people, but not pretentous. The term reminds me of David Brooks´s book, Bobo´s In Paradise. Aanyway, there are more than 5 rooms here and they are only cool if you are into what I liek to call East German chic circa 1980. That is sparse, cold hard floor, nothing on the walls, and in the corner--this says it all I think--a tall glass vase with a dead tree coming out. Not exacyl warm and inviting to my taste, but clearly modern and hip.

After a shower, a little frisky time--hey we haven´t been away alone for more than 3 days in 10 years--and a quick nap were out to explore the neighborhood of Palermo and then meet Beth and Bob at their apartment and dinner out.

We exited the 5 Cool Rooms and took a left down Honduras Ave. towards the Plaza. The air was warm and thick and the pace was slow everything was comfortable and inviting. Every street vendor seemed to have cool handmade items that said things like one world, or >. We picked up a T shirt for my 9 moth old nephew Jack that reads, "El Mundo...." . (His mother, my sister Kathleen, has speant 6 months in Buenos Aires in 2000 so we thought it was perfect.) But perhaps more striking was the people. Every 2 out of three women looked like models. Healthy, friendly, cool, dressed really sexy but tasteful. The guys too. They all looked like cool artist, bohemians, good looking, friendly. Mrs. C would have loved this place, not to mention the Fonz. Every open restaraunt we passed looked more hip and inviting than the previous. Nothing pretentious, just cool.

We got some flowers and took a cab to our Bob and Beth´s and arrived on time at 7pm. We met Bob and Beth through Ashley´s father Wilford and his Carole. They new the couple in northern California through the Institute of Noetic Sciences, a new agy, global looking outdoorsy group that Beth´s dad used to lead in San Francisco, and through Barbara and Galen Rowell. Barbara and Galen are renowned photogaphers and expedioners. Bob is Galen´s brother. I had known the name Galen Rowell for some time because of Wilford. When I first met Wilford, when Ashley and I started dating, he was recently divorced from Del, my mother-in-law, and living in an apartment in Cambridge on the corner of Fairweather and ____ Streets >. It was a great apartment that we stayed at when he was away. The first thing one noticed when you walked into the apartment was a giant, stunning, photograph of K2, the decond tallest mountain in the world. Wilford was proud to sahre that it was print just for him from his good friend, Galen Rowell. The name time in my life, the unique name, and the powerful photo all mixed to leave a surreal impression in my mind whenever I heard the name Galen Rowell. But I knkew little of him.

We checked in with the security guard, and took the elevator up to the 7th floor to Bob and Beth´s apartment. Instantly likd them. Down to earth and very welcoming. From Trucke, <> CAlifornia, they decided to go with their two daughters to Argentina for 1 years. Its now become 4.


Friday, April 18, 2008

JOHN - April 18, 2008, Chicago

We departed from Logan Airport and arrived at O’Hare (because its on the way to Buenos Aires?!). After a 3 hour layover (chair massage for me by some guy named Roaul at the “Rub Hub”—quite good, browsing the bookshops, and dinner at Wolfgang Puck’s restaurant) we finally boarded. There were some random open seats and Ashley began the hunt. Something in her changes. She smells blood or something and gets into hyper focus mode. In this case the hunt was on for a row of three seats across for us, room to lie down should we need it on the eleven hour flight. I had just loaded our carry-on bags onto the overhead bin and was about to sit in our assigned seats…” Hon! Come on! We gotta go right now!” “Huh?” “Come on, go, go, go!” Of course I blindly followed. We got three together but she was disappointed not to have landed two rows of three back to back which she had her sights on until some lady (bitch) just sat down ahead of us. So instead of 6 seats for the two of us we had to settle for 3. We got settled, watched the stupid movie about how to buckle a seat, and then we waited. And waited. Over a good hour. We were told a gage on the second (backup) engine was not opening correctly and it was being worked on. Then after a good hour we were told they were grounding the fucker. "Everybody up. Get your shit. Vaminos! Thank you for choosing American Airlines."

April ’07 has not been a good month for American Airlines. They recently grounded 2,000 aircraft for faulty <> causing disruption throughout their schedule for weeks. They were just catching up we were told.

As I write this they just announced that they have in fact grounded the plane and they have found a new plane. The new departure time is now 11:55pm out of gate K5 arriving in B.A. at 1:30 PM (instead of 9:30am). “At least the girls aren’t with us,” says Ashley.

I kind of wish they were.

Leaving them for 9 days is a new record. Also the idea of our flying together has been weighing on my mind. Growing up my parents would never fly together without my sister, Kathleen, and I. Their fear was dying in a fiery crash and leaving us orphans. I always liked that idea of them not flying alone. My mom’s mom had died when she was 3 and obviously affected her deeply. She has a fear of, well not a fear so much as a grave appreciation, for what can go wrong when someone leaves on a trip or goes away, or arrives late from somewhere. She is more prone than most to think the worst. I inherited that and I think my sister may have as well. As a result when I say goodbye to them, or Ashley, or Noelle or Aydan, it always occurs to me that this could be it. Morbid, yes, but I do 95% of the time feel good that I left on a good note, or make sure to say something nice as opposed to a sarcastic joke. I hate for my last words to a loved one to be, “Nice tie jackass, hopefully next time I see you you’ll have lost it.”

So 9 days away from Aydan and Noelle feels kind of long. Its great to have time alone with Ashley. I’m very excited about the trip and frankly its got me kind of “frisky” as Mr. C would say on Happy Days.

ASHLEY - April 18, 2008, Flight from Boston to Chicago, en route to Bueonos Aires

This all started when I was born. Born into a family that traveled the world and bred wanderlust into their children. I grew up traveling, living abroad both with my family and then when I was older, alone. I have stayed in one place for 12 years now and it is time to go again.

John and I are on route to South America via Chicago from Boston on our scouting trip for our year abroad. We head to Buenos Aires for one night, ferry to Montevideo, Uruguay for 2 nights, overnight ourselves to Mexico City to catch a 4.5 hour bus to Guanajuato for 2 nights, then head west to San Miguel de Allende for a night, back to Mexico City and then home. Our 10 day, 7 night (two nights lost in the air) whirlwind tour to pick our destination for our year away.

What will we pick? What at the end of the day will be most important to us? How much risk are we willing to take? We are hoping to have answers to all of these 10 days from now. We plan to depart our home in Wayland, MA come fall, for a year abroad with our two young girls, Noelle and Aydan because…well, because we want to. We want our children to appreciate another way of life, to become global citizens, we want to slow down together, we want to learn another language, meet new people, be treated to different customs, live with less and appreciate more. We want to get closer as a family, and have an adventure together.

“I think we should eat breakfast together every morning, be home for the kids when they return from school, take art classes and do whatever we feel like each day.” That’s my fantasy. John suggested bringing a juicer and a bread maker – both symbolize to me a slower pace of life.

“Let’s go for a new look while we are away,” John said. Why not? Maybe I’ll go for short, blond hair, and John will shave his head. Who knows, but we do know we are looking to switch things up for a year. This year will change all of our lives, we know that.

I have been struck lately by how empowering and overwhelming this is. If for one moment we doubt ourselves and stop moving forward on all the tasks that need to be done to get us away, we will not go. We are the only ones making this happen. The tasks are daunting – from renting our home, to getting health insurance, fixing everything in our house, picking a location and schools, finding a house to rent, figuring out where our cats will stay, getting vaccines, transferring funds, setting up electronic payments, managing this financially…the list goes on.

John and I are taking a leave from our jobs for a year, and are hopefully picking up a special assignment we created for ourselves which will provide both excitement and some income.

We committed ourselves to going away regardless of income, figuring if we can rent our home in Wayland, worst case scenario, we live cheaply for a year on $25,000. We are willing to forgo the money making potential we have for a year and cut into our savings for this experience. This is the going in premise, but our hope is that we will cover our costs at a minimum with a part time job of sorts.

So, what are we looking for in our new home for a year? We definitely want safe. We are not interested in danger or political unrest. We want access to good health care and access to treatment in a medical emergency. We want a lower cost of living and a slower pace of life. We want warm temperatures and friendly people. We want a different language and culture. We need access to the Internet on a regular basis. We’d prefer a time zone similar to the US.

We started with the belief that given our criteria, we might as well begin by narrowing our choices to Mexico, Latin America and South America. Then we started by talking to everyone we knew about what we were looking for and then talking to the people they referred us to. This lead us to consider Panama, Mexico, Ecuador, Belize, and Uruguay.

Belize lasted for one phone call until we realized they speak English as their primary language.

Panama was intriguing in many ways, but after a run in the cool early morning of in Sausalito hills, I decided sweltering heat for a year would be too much.

At a conference I asked Oscar who was from El Salvador and did a lot of traveling, if he could go to one place in S. America for a year, where would he go. He thought for a minute, and then it dawned on him, “Montevideo!” he said. It is suppose to have the best lifestyle of S. America – friendly, safe, Spanish speaking, temperature of Atlanta, beautiful, accessible to Buenos Aires.